Some may say I’m a whiner. That I tend to complain. Well, I’m not malcontent, but I sure as hell know how to voice my dissatisfaction. And what I’m about to voice goes far beyond mere dissatisfaction.
I’m irate. And I’m going to rehab. For 90 days.
I’ve been wrestling with the Bar Committee all summer, trying to get approved to practice in the beautiful state in which I decided to settle down and sit for the bar. Well the bought is over, the final bell has rung, and the scores are in:
Bar Committee: 1
Despite my disgust at having to be forthcoming, I disclosed my bipolar disorder on the bar application– which is mandatory. I signed some waivers for them to talk to my two current providers, who I trust, and I thought the match was over.
It was not. Next, the Committee, in all its warmth of understanding, twisted my arm and forced me to cough up 5 years worth of confidential medical records, under the auspices that my file required “further review.” I was warned that anything short of full compliance would not result in admission to the bar.
I knew it was about to get ugly. I braced myself for referral to a lawyer’s assistance program. I thought they could do no worse than send me to substance abuse classes (going rate is $100 a week) and assign me a mentor.
I was wrong.
And it’s gotten uglier.
The lawyer’s program called and said that, based on my file blah blah blah, they were recommending a three day INPATIENT evaluation.
I smiled. I promptly scheduled. I went in with a game plan: no crying, no napping, and, above all, I would pretend to be friendly.
My plan didn’t work.
I’ve been sentenced to 90 days inpatient rehab.
Why yes, I have been clean since May. Yes sir, I stopped binge drinking years ago.
What’s that you say? It doesn’t matter?
What are you carrying on about? You say I’m an alcoholic? That I’m an addict? That I’m in denial?
Oh, so you’re not interested in the evidence that proves that I’ve been clean for months? And you didn’t listen to me when I described how and why I decided to get clean?
They were not much for listening.
Well it’s not possible to win a wrestling match with the bar committee– they pay all the judges, fill all the seats, and fix the outcome before the wrestlers even take to the mat.
And I’m irate. And rehab bound.